Mummy & Me – That’s What She Said

That’s What She Said is a newly opened cafe in Underwood. It’s a little hard to  tell the name of it as the signage is quite small.
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They seem to major on coffees and breaky, but will soon extend to lunch.

The mixed choc and salted caramel muffin I had was quite yummy although a little dry. The Flat White I had was quite nice (what do I know?). What stands out is the attentive, bright and cheery service.
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Pram Access: isn’t a problem

High Chairs: clean IKEA type

Changing: ask for the key from the front desk and walk to the back of the building where there are clean toilets. The change table is in the disabled toilet.

This is a great addition to the small row of take aways and health appointments. I’ve heard the dentist here and Dr. Lee at the GP are quite good :p

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How to break your K-addiction (Part 1)

Hi Guys!

So a do receive a number of comments now and again of people sharing the similar struggle of being addicted to Korean related entertainment: K-POP, K-Dramas, anything related to the Hallyu Wave really.

The people that share these struggles (often Christians) know that other relationships are suffering because of their attachment to consuming this media.

My twin sister is a psychologist and we got talking about this one time and I asked her her thoughts on it (she’s not into Korean pop culture at all though). And I thought I might share some of our conversation in the hope to help all of us. This first part deals with the similarities of K-addiction with regular addictions. The second part will give some suggestions on how to break out of it (if that’s what you want).

9689649 - young asian woman having a headache. isolated on a white background.

First of all, let’s clarify that there’s nothing inherently wrong with enjoying the Hallyu Wave. As I explained in a previous post, there are dangers that we need to be aware of, but that doesn’t disqualify us from watching it completely. We just don’t want too much of a good thing right? But how do you know when our interest has moved from a healthy enjoyment to an addiction?

She says: “In the past, one would only buy a particular pop idol’s CDs, read about them in a magazine such as dolly or girlfriend, and put their posters up on your wall. Nowadays, you don’t have to go to much effort to acquire information and delve into the pop idol world given the high accessibility and various forms of online media related to a pop idols, pop groups.”

My comment: “Yes this so true, even Japanese pop culture is not as accessible as Korean pop culture. Hallyu is extremely accessible to the English speaking world, whereas my previous interests in J-culture and C-culture require a higher command of the language.”

“In general, the individual spends a lot of time on these various forms of media gaining information about the target of the obsession. Gaining information about the target(s) functions provides euphoric feelings but can also function to improve the self-image / self-confidence of the individual either directly through engaging with the the target(s) of the obsession or engaging socially with others who also have interest in the target(s) of the obsession.

The obsession then grows from one thing to a more general obsession aided by the accessibility of a network of media and information on the Internet. For example, it might begin with one kpop group, but then expands to different groups / artists, and then to an obsession with kpop or korean dramas or even to korean culture in general. This in itself is not a big issue; however, given the above stated variety of media and high accessiblity to it, the individual finds them self becoming more preoccupied with the growing targets of obsession.”
My comment: “Indeed, how easy is it to click on a chain of videos on YT! I start watching one MV and then I’m curious about one member of a group then the suggested videos show them in variety shows, or commercials and before I know it, I’ve followed them on their Instagram account!”
“The nature of the pop industry and marketing has also changed, in that kpop permeates not just music but other media as well, such as reality TV shows, clothing, dramas, etc; resulting in an even larger preoccupation with the target and growing targets of obsession. 
This becomes problematic as it takes over one’s life in terms of responsibility and leisure activities, and when the individual finds it hard to control or stop the obsession or use of media to become preoccupied with the obsession. Also problematic is when people’s self-image / body image is tied up with the obsession in that they feel they need to engage with this obsession or emulate some aspect of the target of the obsession in order to be accepted or obtain approval from others.”

Let’s have a look at the Psych Bible the ‘DSM-5’ and see how they would diagnose it. There are 11 criteria and 2 of them need to apply to qualify as a ‘substance abuse disorder’ (like drugs). Here are some relevant criteria my sister highlighted. The full list can be found here:

  • Impaired control: (1) taking more or for longer than intended, (2) unsuccessful efforts to stop or cut down use, (3) spending a great deal of time obtaining, using, or recovering from use, (4) craving for substance.
  • Social impairment: (5) failure to fulfill major obligations due to use, (6) continued use despite problems caused or exacerbated by use, (7) important activities given up or reduced because of substance use. 
  • Risky use: (8) recurrent use in hazardous situations, (9) continued use despite physical or psychological problems that are caused or exacerbated by substance use.
  • Pharmacologic dependence: (10) tolerance to effects of the substance, (11) withdrawal symptoms when not using or using less.* 

Does this sound like you?

Now of course, K-addiction isn’t the same as substance abuse, but unfortunately the Psych world/Bible is not up to date. There’s not even a proper ‘label’ to diagnose someone with K-addiction. The closest ‘label’ I guess for these sorts of addictions would be ‘Internet Addiction’ which is under a broader group called ‘Impulse Control Disorders’ but even then, Internet Addiction is not a broad enough term to apply to K-addiction since we consume K-media not just from the Internet/Computer, but Social Media like following an idols FB / Twitter / Snapchat account, buying their music, watching their videos (which may not be through the net), and also buying their merch or getting plastic surgery as a result of consuming Korean pop culture.

So in summary:

  • K-addiction is in some ways unique as it is extremely accessible unlike other pop cultures (Japan, Hong Kong, Taiwan). Not only is it available in English more than the others, it is available on more platforms, particularly YT and other social media platforms.
  • There’s no official ‘label’ as such for such an addiction (the closest official is ‘Impulse Control Disorder’ of which ‘Internet Addiction’ is one but then the addiction is much broader than the ‘Internet’.
  • However, we can use what DSM-5 lists out to show that consuming Korean pop culture can be a very real addiction, as real as being addicted to drugs!

Next post, we offer suggestions on how to handle it

Of course, if you can see a psychologist, PLEASE DO!! In Australia, you can go to your GP and answer some questions. If you are severe then they will refer you (under Medicare) to see a psychologist FOR FREE.

Don’t lose hope! Acknowledging is the first step to resolving! If you’re a Christian I encourage you to acknowledge the problem and ask God for help. If we repent, God can’t wait to forgive us and give us the power to break through!

 

Mummy & Me – The Al Fresco at Rochedale

Bub woke up at 430 am in the morning and wouldn’t go back to sleep… egh…By 930, after being awake for 5 hours, I was thinking about getting some coffee.

We headed out to the Rochedale Estates as I heard there was a cafe in their Lifestyle Centre. The place seemed popular for a lot of upcoming birthday parties so I was keen to check it out.

Rochedale Estates is a new residential area with lots of big houses. The Lifestyle Centre is where the office, gymnasium, lap pool, wading pool and cafe are situated. Across from the Lifestyle Centre carpark I spied a large house with four cars parked behind it’s gates. One of them was the infamous Initial-D car…don’t know if it’s indicative of the kind of people living here.

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The Al Fresco cafe at Rochedale is a very nice spot, overlooking the pool and entertainment areas. Sure enough, there was a party going on. Unfortunately, unless you’re a resident, the pool areas are off limits unless you’re with a resident.
The cafe has a breakfast, lunch and dinner menu – looks like it can be booked for functions too. It appears to be run by Koreans, though the food is modern Australian. I had an Iced Latte which was just what I expected.

Pram Access: lots of wide open spaces, easily fit prams.

High Chairs: the usual IKEA variety.

Changing: unfortunately the only visitor toilet in the area is only accessible via a short flight of stairs. Not sure if there was a change table in there as I couldn’t get up.

Overall, a really nice spot which has a relaxed hotel/resort feel. Hope to grab a buddy and try the food next time!

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Mummy & Me – Simply Beans

sorry I don't drink proper coffee

sorry I don’t drink proper coffee

Hidden away in an industrial complex is this roastery. It’s pretty serious stuff, machinery, a zillion types of beans, demo area, books, awards, gift shop, as well as a cosy little cafe. Not something you’d expect in this area of town.

Honestly I feel pretty fake being here, since I’m in no way a coffee person (my cafe beverage of choice is a mocha or green tea latte). I’m not qualified to comment on my beverage, except to say that I enjoyed it. I’m sure you can check out beanhunter for better info. They also have a small number of breakfast options and baked goods.

Inside, there’s only a few tables, but there’s more stool seating outside.

Pram Access: it is tight, double pram no way.

High Chairs: none that I can see

Changing: There’s an old but well maintained toilet out the back but no where to change bub.

Not really a place for an active baby or toddler I’m afraid. There’s lots of open shelves in the cafe filled with coffee making paraphernalia and breakables.

Good place to come by yourself with sleeping bub or to catch up with a friend over some serious coffee.
If you’re a coffee lover, definitely go and try it out.

Simply Beans Coffee on Urbanspoon

Mummy & Me – Grandma’s Kiwi Kitchen & Gallery

image from official siteNestled amongst car dealerships and warehouses, this place doesn’t seem to belong in our area – in a good way! Grandma’s Kiwi Kitchen is a classy cafe and gallery featuring art and food from New Zealand.

It seems popular with the officey types across the road at the law firm. Fancy juices for post workout types, home made baked sweets for long catch ups, and of course authentic NZ food for those who want a taste of home. Also has a selection of vegetarian, vegan and gluten free options for the health conscious.

I had a whitebait omelette while my companions had kumara chips. I’ve also tried their chocolate beetroot cake which was lovely and moist as well as a fresh apple and mint juice.

Lovely place! The only downside is that it’s not that suitable for times you’re with bub. It’s do-able but not straight forward…

Pram Access: if you’re bringing a pram your best bet is to sit outside. Otherwise, leave the pram downstairs and walk up to the mezzanine level where you can sit amongst the artworks. It is a bit hard (juggling bub, nappy bag, order stick thing, cutlery/serviettes) , so get the person you’re with to help you carry everything.

High Chairs: there’s a bit of a mish-mash of a few high chairs. Some of them are the kind that hook onto an existing chair. Unfortunately the chairs provided wasn’t safe to use as the whole thing kept sliding off the chair.

Changing: There are clean toilets on the mezzanine level but no changing facilities.

Definitely worth a visit if you’re in the area! They also have stalls at the Logan Central markets on Sunday mornings and just started at Kuraby markets.

Grandmas Kiwi Kitchen on Urbanspoon